She whose name is Notting: juday for life

She whose name is Notting: juday for life



Basta ginanahan na ako na magbawas ng timbang.
Payat na si idol!!!!

The greatest love of all

Online Videos by Veoh.com

Addictted to Dinnes Trillo

Tsikahan with Vjei

lovielly (8:41:48 AM): Goodmowning!!!! Meow....meow...meow...
lovielly (8:42:03 AM): Good mood na ba si Catwoman?
lovielly (8:42:33 AM): hehehe si Erv perteng sukua sa picture.... luod daw... kiber!!! diva fren!!!!
lovielly (8:45:02 AM): teka? wats wrong sa indian filmS? Bitaw luod ang video.... ang music ug lyric ra ang gwapo... heart breaking ayu.. pero ng concept sa video FAR OUT!!! I love you fren... I hate thier films tooo... ayayay, parehas gyud ta.... Nganong hate nako?
lovielly (8:45:47 AM): Out of this planet!!!! mushy wala sa lugar ug dili brain buster ang film. Dili witty ang mga dialouges.....
lovielly (8:45:55 AM): hay....
gaelic_99 (8:54:43 AM): gagah good morning
gaelic_99 (8:55:52 AM): shit pagkapamati sa picture!!!! hanep!!!!!
gaelic_99 (8:56:01 AM): gaga gyud ni o!!!!
lovielly (9:21:28 AM): duna pay usa... kadyot.
gaelic_99 (9:21:55 AM): basi bold na na ha.
lovielly (9:22:07 AM): ay shit... luod gyud diay. harharhar
gaelic_99 (9:22:14 AM): bwisit daw ka ingon sa imong bana.
lovielly (9:22:43 AM): Cge... nauli-an nako sa akong sanity
lovielly (9:22:54 AM): Fren... imo article wer na?
gaelic_99 (9:22:56 AM): o bakit moon na naman? lunatic ka no?
gaelic_99 (9:23:14 AM): fren, wala pa, shit.....
lovielly (9:23:19 AM): wa ko lain lingaw. harharhar.. take ur time uy... bz baya ka
gaelic_99 (9:23:51 AM): paano ako maka alis dito.
lovielly (9:24:04 AM): For ervs, muexam napud si BS para sa achievers test sa skul dis saturday 2pm
lovielly (9:24:32 AM): hwag kang umalis uy..... love the unloveable. bah... hirap gawin yan pero challenging
lovielly (9:25:31 AM): lunatic? Murag si Veronica nga nag M sa atubangan sa buang buang sad kunuhay
gaelic_99 (9:25:39 AM): di ko talaga ma take frend. nakakarindi na as in.
gaelic_99 (9:25:53 AM): pag m pud oi.
lovielly (9:27:03 AM): yike.... bad ka... go home!!!
gaelic_99 (9:27:17 AM): ay dili ko....mag chat pa ko.
lovielly (9:27:28 AM): Mag uload ka ng emotions.... mag blog ka uy para matake mo dyan
lovielly (9:27:44 AM): unload diay
gaelic_99 (9:27:48 AM): loves di gyud ko kabalo mag blog.
gaelic_99 (9:27:50 AM): as in.
gaelic_99 (9:27:52 AM): promise
lovielly (9:28:37 AM): wait ha? visit this
lovielly (9:29:55 AM): http://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=38776029
lovielly (9:30:03 AM): ASAP fren
gaelic_99 (9:30:11 AM): ok
gaelic_99 (9:31:00 AM): wa man ko google account day
gaelic_99 (9:31:57 AM): frend webcam beh
gaelic_99 (9:32:05 AM): kalimot na ko sa imong face
lovielly (9:32:07 AM): shocks... wala ko nagapacomment. Ginapareject nako. Personal man gud... duna pud ko other site nga open mucomment ... pero kana nga site para sa akong journey with BS, you and my mami and papa
lovielly (9:32:32 AM): yaw uy.... nagbra ug panty ra ko... suko ervs kay frustrated boldstar daw ko
lovielly (9:32:58 AM): nge... di bitaw ko kabalo.... giaway nako erv kay wala nya natarung ug taud
gaelic_99 (9:33:38 AM): di daw ka kabalo mugamit.
gaelic_99 (9:33:41 AM): hahahaha
gaelic_99 (9:33:49 AM): yawa gyud ni imong bana oi.
lovielly (9:36:06 AM): bitaw, di ko kabalo.Har! Har!
lovielly (9:37:32 AM): go to http://beta.blogger.com , then register ka, himo ka account sa beta blogger, but before that dapat naa ka account sa gmail, so register sa ka sa www.gmail.com, himo ka ug email account sa gmail...then, pwede na ka himo blogsite sa betablogger using your gmail na email add...then if mag-update ka, adto gihapon ka log-on sa http://beta.blogger.com, then sa Dashboard pangitaa ang new post, didto ka magpost ug new entry..
lovielly (9:38:56 AM): I will be waiting for your blogsite.... dun mo blog novel mo..... you can make friends with diffrent kinds of writer. Just dont link me kay dunay mga personal write-ups sa ako blog.
lovielly (9:40:06 AM): wala ko nagapacomment sa kani nga site.. email ra fren if duna kay reactions sa ako articles.
lovielly (9:41:23 AM): bru, dali ra ng google uy... jus follow my instruction above.
lovielly (9:42:19 AM): Where is Jayvee Jude? hehehe
lovielly (9:43:14 AM): ayyy... naka orange.... favorite color
gaelic_99 (9:43:23 AM): gi kiss ka ng bana mo
gaelic_99 (9:43:35 AM): gagah. red yan day, color blind ka ha.
lovielly (9:43:36 AM): hoy Jack black... womens talk ra ni
lovielly (9:43:59 AM): Halaka ang eyeglass, pang rpao chief... pagmasters na uy
lovielly (9:44:11 AM): Maam?
lovielly (9:44:18 AM): Nice lips
lovielly (9:44:24 AM): ug nose
lovielly (9:44:30 AM): mura kag si Shawie
gaelic_99 (9:44:48 AM): yaw jud ka loves.
gaelic_99 (9:45:07 AM): thats what i love about you ba, kay ginapakatawa ko nimo.
lovielly (9:45:08 AM): naopen mo na ang blog site ko?
gaelic_99 (9:45:36 AM): wala pa loves
gaelic_99 (9:45:43 AM): tamad lagi ko lately frend
gaelic_99 (9:45:47 AM): ngano man?
gaelic_99 (9:45:54 AM): sa pagka depress ni ba.
lovielly (9:46:03 AM): Katawa ka dyan.. tinuod man sad... bwisit basig matumboy ko.... grrrrr.........
gaelic_99 (9:46:30 AM): ay patulan ta gyud ka.
lovielly (9:46:48 AM): normal yan... dami na tau. Mabuhay ang mga tamad! Mabuhay si Erv!
gaelic_99 (9:46:56 AM): mga buang daw ta loves ingon sa imong uyab.
gaelic_99 (9:47:12 AM): hahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
lovielly (9:47:29 AM): ay, sino ang nas likod si mama daisy? Lami- a nya pinsingun uy
gaelic_99 (9:47:57 AM): bwisit gyud ka oi!!!
lovielly (9:48:28 AM): Maminsingay baya ko... murag si Xena ba, the warrior princess. tara jei ikaw kunyari si gabrielle... pinsingun nato daisy kay cute sya magbasa ug newspaper
gaelic_99 (9:48:52 AM): mao lang man gyud na iyang work.
lovielly (9:49:31 AM): lagi uy... tig guntingay. Unya gusto ka mahimung chief sa mga naga gunting?
gaelic_99 (9:49:41 AM): anong ginaka busy-han mo jan babae?
lovielly (9:50:13 AM): wala... basa ko unya Tis ni McCourt.
gaelic_99 (9:50:30 AM): oh okay. ganahan ka niya?
lovielly (9:51:03 AM): nagatuon sad ug swishmax.... unya magparenew ug lisyensya sa Ilo-ilo arun duna koy rayt manghinambug. Ilongga na sad ko
gaelic_99 (9:51:21 AM): unsang swishmax?
lovielly (9:51:38 AM): Ya... ganahan sa sad ko ug biography. Makabrayt man diay.... bantog ra brayt ka jei
lovielly (9:51:51 AM): animation na sya fren
gaelic_99 (9:51:58 AM): not as bright as you oi.
gaelic_99 (9:52:12 AM): ah okay. na daghan na gyud ka raket ana.
lovielly (9:52:30 AM): di oi..... kaduha ra ko...opp aya na ug supak danha
gaelic_99 (9:53:04 AM): i-on na imo cam ba, gusto ta ka makit-an.
lovielly (9:53:11 AM): hay raket..... pobre ko run.... under na pud ko ni rvs... magbinut-an na sad ko niya
lovielly (9:53:49 AM): Ako na gyud gi-on.... wildan gyud nako na ervs pag abot diri.... hahahah joke ra
gaelic_99 (9:54:13 AM): cge na invite me na ba.
lovielly (9:54:31 AM): bitaw... mag wild ko bah... manulak ko ug uyab sa escalator sa SM
gaelic_99 (9:55:12 AM): hahahahaha! ako ba to loves o ikaw?
lovielly (9:55:15 AM): Hoy, kalami sa imo life dira... di ka bz?
lovielly (9:55:24 AM): murag imu bitaw to oi.
gaelic_99 (9:55:44 AM): when the cat is away, the pretty and sexy mouse will chat.
lovielly (9:56:12 AM): wait, napanood mo na mtv ni Beyonce nga LISTEN? American dream nga movie,... gwapo jei ba
lovielly (9:56:25 AM): sexy ayo sya. makalagot
gaelic_99 (9:56:30 AM): wala pa gyud.
gaelic_99 (9:56:40 AM): lagi, always man gyud na sya sexy.
gaelic_99 (9:56:52 AM): gusto nako gayahon, pero imposible kaayo.
gaelic_99 (9:57:00 AM): lami ug lawas no?
lovielly (9:57:15 AM): Pastilan pu nga na cat uy... kusog kaau mamantay unya wa nag tan-aw nga grabe pud sya mu personal use sa opisina
lovielly (9:57:58 AM): yaw saba ha... di ko ganahan ingun ana nga tawo fren... hipokrts ayu.
gaelic_99 (9:58:27 AM): korak!
gaelic_99 (9:58:44 AM): nganong musaba man daw ko? we're on the same boat frend oi.
lovielly (9:58:44 AM): abi nako kokak. Daut na ako mata dah
gaelic_99 (9:59:13 AM): funny ka lagi frend no?
gaelic_99 (9:59:27 AM): ganahan kaayo ko anang character nimo ba.
gaelic_99 (9:59:43 AM): pwede mabiling mag-isa, maka survive gyud no matter what.
lovielly (10:00:01 AM): hoi fren... kaya man na basta duna ra tay kwarta.... mablessed unta ko fren arun ilibre taka ug xenical for a months use.... cge lang kaloy an..... musexy ra ta.....
gaelic_99 (10:00:01 AM): very independent, strong-willed and at the same time, funny.
gaelic_99 (10:00:14 AM): love gud ta ka frend, how i wish ana sad ko.
lovielly (10:00:36 AM): kahadluk.... tua na pud daisy o... nadistruck ako brainpower
gaelic_99 (10:00:47 AM): masking wa kay kwarta, makapangita dayon ka ug paagi para maka money
gaelic_99 (10:00:54 AM): raketista ka frend!!!!
gaelic_99 (10:01:05 AM): hahahahaha!
lovielly (10:01:27 AM): uy... seryoso na ah..... murag dili maayo gyud imo disposisyon. Shake your head sa uy.
gaelic_99 (10:01:45 AM): ill shake my big butt instead.
lovielly (10:01:55 AM): Lahat tayo magaling.... iemote mo yang rama mo sa blog, tell you, you will feel better
gaelic_99 (10:02:26 AM): pa share anang imong brainpower beh, kahit 25% lang.
lovielly (10:03:38 AM): Pagka gaga na lang gyud.... Mas madaming laman yang sayo uy.... Defense mechanism ko lang tong ' As if I know everything, babe" kay in truth, gamay ra ang substance ani.
lovielly (10:04:15 AM): Pildihun na lang sila sa ASTA ba nga malditahun, arun di daugdaugon....
lovielly (10:04:36 AM): POi... seryoso na ka... kahilakun na ko...
gaelic_99 (10:05:23 AM): ay very wrong ka gyud diha mare. makasulat ba diay kog sonnet?
gaelic_99 (10:06:21 AM): si miss sonneta
lovielly (10:06:24 AM): kaluod atung sonnet 1. Dili baya ingun ato ang tinuod nga sonnet ha? pasonnet sonnet ra to oi. informal.
lovielly (10:06:37 AM): Grrr..... pang korean.... ganahan ko ana
gaelic_99 (10:06:47 AM): pag himu na sad ug lain sonnet ha...
gaelic_99 (10:06:53 AM): ang unsang pang korean?
lovielly (10:07:15 AM): this time... hulatun sa nako imong artiles arun mainspired na sad ko.
lovielly (10:07:25 AM): unsa ka... lets grow together
gaelic_99 (10:09:06 AM): unsang korean friend? basta lagi korean, mubagting akong ears.
lovielly (10:09:07 AM): lami gani imu kahimtang dira. Pang career girl ayo. Magmake-up, mag opis, pagkaudto mukaon sa fud ni manung gas, tapos uli balay, tsika tsika, tapos opis na sad... o di va? boring ayu? hahahaha
lovielly (10:09:45 AM): kadtong Ms sonneta. Korean ang dating
gaelic_99 (10:09:47 AM): as in 100%.
gaelic_99 (10:09:50 AM): wala man lang
gaelic_99 (10:09:57 AM): taping...
gaelic_99 (10:10:00 AM): pictorials...
gaelic_99 (10:10:05 AM): interviews...
gaelic_99 (10:10:07 AM): shooting...
gaelic_99 (10:10:11 AM): recording....
gaelic_99 (10:10:17 AM): making love with robert...
gaelic_99 (10:10:22 AM): and with ken...
gaelic_99 (10:10:27 AM): hahay!
lovielly (10:10:34 AM): har! har! har!
lovielly (10:10:41 AM): Destiny yan.....
lovielly (10:10:45 AM): malay natin....
lovielly (10:10:50 AM): si Stan
lovielly (10:10:58 AM): ang tutuloy nyan
gaelic_99 (10:11:12 AM): ay stage mother ek gyud ko.
gaelic_99 (10:11:22 AM): akoy mupili sa iyang ka loveteam.
lovielly (10:11:24 AM): Ala eh!!!! kung di ba naman ikaw magiging stage mom
lovielly (10:11:33 AM): tan-awa!!!!
gaelic_99 (10:11:37 AM): gusto nako kadtong youngest ni ate shawie.
lovielly (10:12:17 AM): ay.... ganahan ko..... bagay gyud. Kiss kong stan ha? makatalk na?
lovielly (10:13:35 AM): yung pics nya u sent me thru email.. bigboy na ayu sya...
gaelic_99 (10:13:44 AM): gamay...as in mama, papa, hala, light, babi (babay gud) ug shu (as in shoes)
gaelic_99 (10:14:05 AM): as in. ingon lagi ni ervs murag grade 1 section 1.
lovielly (10:14:28 AM): Halaka oi..... ang cute.... ang cute.......
gaelic_99 (10:14:42 AM): cute gyud ang mama.
lovielly (10:14:44 AM): wait... bs is here... mag read daw me
gaelic_99 (10:14:53 AM): okay...
gaelic_99 (10:14:58 AM): love you BS.
gaelic_99 (10:15:06 AM): kahit wala gift si ninang,
lovielly (10:15:56 AM): enough na ang sincerity... walang presyo yan...
gaelic_99 (10:15:58 AM): utang muna.
gaelic_99 (10:16:03 AM): hehehe, as always
lovielly (10:16:30 AM): yayaman karin... nasa mga palad mo yan... nakaukit na ng malalim
gaelic_99 (10:16:47 AM): day pwede ka sa telenovela.
lovielly (10:17:11 AM): ibibigay ni Lord kapag willing ka ng masaktan... kapag di mo na iniinda ang sakit
lovielly (10:17:21 AM): kapag strong ka na emotionally
lovielly (10:17:29 AM): inother words
gaelic_99 (10:17:35 AM): shit! iniinda huh? di ko yan alam ah.
lovielly (10:17:41 AM): kapa matured na ang utak mo. hahahaha
gaelic_99 (10:17:54 AM): tama. di pa talaga ako matured.
lovielly (10:18:46 AM): yun nga eh... vulnerabloe ka masyado. para bang lumaki kang spoiled, seyorita, kaya ang nipis ng puso mo, kay daling masaktan, tapos ano?
lovielly (10:18:59 AM): itatawa mo lang,
lovielly (10:19:03 AM): ingingiti
gaelic_99 (10:19:08 AM): friend hanep ka lagi!
lovielly (10:19:12 AM): pero pagadting ke jeph
gaelic_99 (10:19:23 AM): alam mo, bagay sa yo mag scriptwriter!
lovielly (10:19:31 AM): na sya namang naging shock absorber ng sama ng loob mo sa opisina
lovielly (10:19:40 AM): ay wala kang pasensya
lovielly (10:19:47 AM): walng pakiramdam
lovielly (10:19:54 AM): kasi di mo alam
lovielly (10:20:01 AM): panu masaktan
lovielly (10:20:05 AM): ng tunay
lovielly (10:20:09 AM): ng totoo
lovielly (10:20:18 AM): Confirmed nga
lovielly (10:20:33 AM): Jayve Jude Vinarao... Isa kang certified spoiled brat
lovielly (10:20:38 AM): nge hehehehe
gaelic_99 (10:21:26 AM): di ah.
gaelic_99 (10:21:37 AM): kang jeph cguro, oo.
gaelic_99 (10:22:28 AM): kawawa baya sya minsan..
lovielly (10:22:33 AM): panu kasi sadyang minamahl ka nya ng tunay
gaelic_99 (10:22:47 AM): shock absorber nga sya...
gaelic_99 (10:22:52 AM): friend...
gaelic_99 (10:22:56 AM): psychic ka?
gaelic_99 (10:23:03 AM): mahadlok lagi ko nimo.
gaelic_99 (10:23:35 AM): parang wala na man akong itatago sa yo.
lovielly (10:23:45 AM): yung totoo? OO Psychic ako.. gifted ako dyan pero itinigil ko na yan..... kaya hwag ka ng matakot
lovielly (10:24:06 AM): kaibigan kita ksi kaya nababasa ko ang pains mo
lovielly (10:24:18 AM): na gawagawa mo lang
gaelic_99 (10:24:23 AM): ay akala ko panis ko...pains pala.
lovielly (10:24:34 AM): wala lang kasing ibang paglagyan ng drama
lovielly (10:24:43 AM): Magblog ka na nga!
gaelic_99 (10:24:54 AM): pag aralan ko pa.
lovielly (10:25:35 AM): natawa ako dun sa panis ah
lovielly (10:25:40 AM): ulol!!!!
gaelic_99 (10:25:43 AM): in fairnes...
lovielly (10:26:11 AM): ang bogging.. di na pinag aaralan. Its all in the instruction
gaelic_99 (10:26:35 AM): cge ill read the instruction
gaelic_99 (10:26:42 AM): stricta ka lagi karon.
lovielly (10:27:43 AM): yan kasi ikaw mahilig ka sa structure, sa frameworks, sa plano.... tandaan mo na ang buhay mas masarap kung sinasabayan lang ang agos.... ang tugtug..... sabi nila pag namaster daw natin ito... sasaya tayo.... pero sabi ko naman
lovielly (10:28:27 AM): kung me tunay kang kaibigan na gaya mo, wala nang mas sasaya pa!!! Kaya tara na
lovielly (10:28:32 AM): imulat ang mata
lovielly (10:28:37 AM): buksan ang tenga
lovielly (10:28:41 AM): punta na tayo
lovielly (10:28:44 AM): dun
lovielly (10:28:45 AM): sa
lovielly (10:28:47 AM): batibot
gaelic_99 (10:28:55 AM): shit.
gaelic_99 (10:29:00 AM): miss ko na batibot
gaelic_99 (10:29:08 AM): pong pagong at
gaelic_99 (10:29:14 AM): kiko matsing
lovielly (10:29:40 AM): ako yung girl na mahilig magpakwento
lovielly (10:29:47 AM): at yung tree sa batibot
lovielly (10:30:16 AM): kung saan sila nagkukuwentuhan
lovielly (10:30:22 AM): nagtatawanan
lovielly (10:30:51 AM): O, ano napagod ka rin kakachat dyan?
lovielly (10:30:55 AM): ay......
lovielly (10:31:29 AM): ang lungkot mo na ulit.... parang na miss mo agad si Jeph. Regards kokang fren ha
gaelic_99 (10:32:06 AM): cgurado ka na si jeph akong na miss?
lovielly (10:34:15 AM): kinsa diay si Joel?
lovielly (10:34:45 AM): Kinsa ng girl? Shit slim... I HATE HER!!! hehehe
gaelic_99 (10:35:05 AM): ha?
gaelic_99 (10:35:44 AM): kinsang slim na girl?
lovielly (10:35:54 AM): unsa na? fud? o ukau-ukay?
gaelic_99 (10:36:43 AM): ah, si anne! bayad sa load na gi utang oi.
lovielly (10:37:27 AM): nagabuhat ko ug article nga what makes me smile. I found out nga theraputic sya. Makalingaw. Bulleted ra gud ang format oi. try mo fren
gaelic_99 (10:38:56 AM): how can I frend na i cant afford to really smile.
gaelic_99 (10:39:06 AM): kung mag smile man ko o mag katawa.
gaelic_99 (10:39:10 AM): pilit ra na.
gaelic_99 (10:39:14 AM): pero deep inside
gaelic_99 (10:39:17 AM): patay
gaelic_99 (10:39:23 AM): theres a hole in my sole
gaelic_99 (10:39:25 AM): and my life
lovielly (10:39:45 AM): o....... normal yan sa mga writer
gaelic_99 (10:40:42 AM): peste!
gaelic_99 (10:40:51 AM): bakit ba sa lahat ng mga angst ko
gaelic_99 (10:40:57 AM): may maisasagot ka?
gaelic_99 (10:41:02 AM): brayt ka man frend oi.
lovielly (10:41:31 AM): tapos wala ka pang.... na-writers block ako.... teka nga send muna akong song for you
gaelic_99 (10:42:08 AM): o tapos i-stop na pud na ha.
lovielly (10:42:08 AM): Kanang searching soul ba... feeing nako bagay sa imung emotions karun
gaelic_99 (10:42:18 AM): tadyakan na gyud ta ka.
lovielly (10:42:46 AM): dili na gyud...... Im playing it right now . like duh
gaelic_99 (10:42:56 AM): gwapo baya
gaelic_99 (10:43:07 AM): pero since imong gipalong ang imo computer..
gaelic_99 (10:43:10 AM): wa nahuman..
lovielly (10:43:16 AM): napakinggan mo na pla?
gaelic_99 (10:43:19 AM): nanagpaguba sa akong adlaw!
lovielly (10:43:24 AM): wait BS is crying
gaelic_99 (10:43:25 AM): sa tinuod lang!
lovielly (10:57:06 AM): Im back... uy.. parang may boyfren kang ka-chat dyan Bru ah
gaelic_99 (10:57:15 AM): meron talaga.
lovielly (10:57:45 AM): kilig!!!!! regard mo ako... concentrate muna dyan...
gaelic_99 (10:57:47 AM): ginbinuangan nako
gaelic_99 (10:57:52 AM): patol pud ang buang
lovielly (10:58:05 AM): syempre, who wuld not?
gaelic_99 (10:58:37 AM): ayaw oi. mas mag concentrate ko sa akong friend kaysa niya.
gaelic_99 (10:58:42 AM): unsa sya? gold?
gaelic_99 (10:59:37 AM): hoy asa na ka?
lovielly (11:02:39 AM): skul time na uy... sick shane kaya ako hatid.... nadownload mo na?
gaelic_99 (11:03:07 AM): receiving pa man loves. ipatay mo na?
lovielly (11:03:49 AM): di naman.... i-leave ko muna... baka madistort araw ng fren kong brat eh
gaelic_99 (11:04:05 AM): talaga!
lovielly (11:23:17 AM): jei, si dad ervs daw silip ingun ni bs
lovielly (11:23:57 AM): dad bs is laughing dugaya sad
lovielly (11:24:21 AM): bakekang
lovielly (11:24:58 AM): asan ka dad.bs
lovielly (11:26:53 AM): dad daw last na
lovielly (11:27:45 AM): tnx jei
gaelic_99 (11:27:52 AM): sureness
gaelic_99 (11:28:01 AM): bakit pala sya umiiyak?
lovielly (12:19:04 PM): sent na fren.. bye till next time
gaelic_99 (12:19:19 PM): thanks

Comment kang Eves

Oi.... kahadluk... di gyud ko mudawat nga liwat sya nako...
Honestly, the best ra kaayo sya nga writer uy.
Makuyapan gyud ko.....
Kita mo naman Besfren.... dahil sa galing mo....ilang taon din akong di makapagsulat.
hehehehe OA na Ba?
Ano ba? Ang layo Bes.... iba ang style mo sa akin.... pang Anne Frank lang ako...
Kalevel mo ang author ng Romeo and Juliet.
Miss you also Bes.
Suroy suroy sa ako blog ha?
Ikaw ra gyud ang masaag dinhi..... hahahaha

Besfren.... mga anak pala ni Darwin... mga soon to be pilot daw.

Bien's Big Day

It is hard to imagine how wild my son was months ago.
He is friendly now.

After undergoing an intensive theraphy in group socialization, I feel better.

There were sleepless nights I spend crying fearing about his future. Buti na lang.... naayos din.

He is by the way doing very well in school. Ewan ko lang din kung ano ang medal na matatanggap nya. Pero yung ugali nya at ang speech problem nya, naadress na ng therapist. Ke laking pasalamat namin kay Lord at normal na normal na ang kanyang feelings.
Ano kasi sya dati eh, kunting problema lang nagwawala na... parang parating inaapi, insecure, manipulative at demanding. Bale two-three years old sya nun. Formative years ng development nya. kaya nga napakacritical nun sa buhay namin.
During my busy years kasi, minaltrato sya ng yaya nya kaya sya naging hyper. Psychological naman yun at unti-unti ng nawawala.

Congrats my son. We are very proud of you.

I am doing this history so that when you're a grown up kid na, you will know all my feelings. You'll have something to read better than any other books and better than any other writer. But of course... ako lang yata ang mommy mo Son!!!

Nurturing Pride

I almost want to quit about Shane’s attitudes towards socialization. She’s so near yet so far. A puppet-like in fact. As I don’t believed her stories in being abused and raped during her younger years, I had accepted it as a way to bring her close again to the family. Nap and I had the same belief on this though.

She had big changes in her studies. This way I really am so happy that she is taking her best step forward. I can see in her eyes her eagerness to impress herself and her family as well. It may be still long way to go but I know she can really make it.

She is allergic in my presence. I can see her being at ease with Gina while so affected in me. I just told my self that there is really something wrong in the way I conveyed my self to her. I examined my heart and indeed I really don’t know why despite of the effort I made and is still trying to make I can not find her inside my heart as a sister or as a person. Do I see her as one? Honestly until now I see her as a puppet. So hurt and so wild inside. Being away and lonesome is only her defense mechanism to nurture her pride. It was her pride that keeps her away and its her pride that keeps her sanity intact.

Believed me when I say that she is a different person inside. Look at her smiles and the way she emotes in her pictures taken by her alone. She was so free and so feral. If She is only in her natural habitat you will never believed the Shane you had been seeing right now. And that’s the real Shane…… where could she possibly acquired such behavior? I could say Genes. I wish to investigate more about her real roots. I had been asking Ervien about it and really what I am seeing in her attitudes has no difference from the stories laid by my husband.

She will be a threat if not taken care by the family. It is just so hard to enumerate the reasons here for I can not assure the privacy of my PC.

Is she still a pervert? I had a series of readings about her personality. On Paulo Coehlos Veronica Decides to die, I see her all through while reading it for about 3 times. It was also followed by a lot of books trying to understand what she had been through.

What I realized about her being so indifferent in me is the factor that I had been reading her too much. Digging more on her makes her sick. As I was trying to understand her, the more I think Im hurting her.

Well, she has been in to a lot of pain…. Enduring it all by herself. Thatיִs how strong she is. She might not yet discover her inner talents but as I consistently told her that she is really somebody. What a waste if she will not widen what God had given her.

DOORWAY

Every time you heal a part of yourself, you bring more light into the world-

unknown author

(While writing this, LeAnn Rhimes, whose angelic pure voice came to me through the speaker of my computer surrounding the room at around 2 am today. Inspiring me to write and allowing me to focus as I listened to her song entitled ´ The Rose` over and over and over)

Slowly as I looked at this child today, I can not forget how he was two years ago when I still have an 8-hour job in SMICZMP, a special project of DENR based in Southern Mindanao. Back then I felt the humiliation and embarrassment. Sometimes when he gets wild I just stood in front of him, grief-stricken and ashamed. Angrily I asked, Why God? Why my son is like this? The depth of my pain seemed unbearable. We are confused of why he was acting like a wild tiger, a human tornado in fact. The doctor said what my son is suffering is not autism…but you see… I am still scared… the disorder is not yet specified.

We spend our days analyzing and researching what was wrong. Until one day our Pedia referred us to the expert. Ervien and I decided to get a full evaluation. We were referred to an expert who seemed eminently qualified. From the referral letter given by Dr. Saavedra, it read:

Dr. Isaguerre
Licenced Psychologist
Developmental Psychologist

She looked good on the white long envelope.

I am not comfortable with the situation were in, but we have to appear reasonable for our own son's sake.

As we sat down, we sank into the chair uncomfortably. The doctor was now facing us. Asking so many questions regarding my son´s condition. Precisely this was only a prelude before evaluating our child.

During the evaluation I moved to BS and rub his back in the hope that it would help him focus on the test. We were not allowed to go inside the testing room.

From the mirror I could see my son who appeared to be tensed. I could understand the negative response of my son to nonverbal pressures. Anyone would feel that way when someone hovering judgementally over you.

The entire process was an eye-opening experience for me as a mother. This is a heart-wrenching moment for me and Ervien. I couldn’t tell the reliability of this doctor but we have to trust him.

Looking straight to the eyes of the doctor she told us that the child is suffering a hyperactive-secondary to emotional disorder.

We were stunned. Hyperactive because he was suffering emotionally? His level of energy might be considered hyperactive, he just don’t get along with people because he has many fears inside him. He can not express his emotions verbally because of fears. Fear for whom? I asked the doctor… then she answered that "that's what we will try to find out"

So he was enrolled right then into a school who caters this kind of disorder.

I began to understand my child why he was acting weirdly whenever we go to work. He was very scared of his yaya. The woman hurts him emotionally and physically. Oh, God!! And yet there was no body home to comfort him. It´s been two years since he was feeling suppressed and abused. He was only turning two years old for God's sake.

We need to moved on and let go of his yaya and all of the hurts the yaya inflicted to him and to all of the hurts we inflicted to our child as well (for freaking out whenever he gets wild… for not understanding him and for spanking him when we think he has been out the borderline, for not bringing him with us in a party, attending mass, malling, shopping thinking that he will only make a mess.). How mean!!!!

Part of our moving on was also resigning from my job. Well, since I am no longer happy with what is going on with my job (which brings me to the conclusion nga kung happy diay ko sa aku- ang job dili ko muresayn?) maybe it is God's way of telling me to really give up my job and focus my attention to my family.

I also needed to see my son differently. As someone who was abused and misunderstood.
So as my son underwent an occupational therapy, I also took mine.

Kindergarten

The first week started badly. As Bien loves the school, I can see that he was also thrilled to meet new friends and new environment. He loves his new teachers and thought that they were very smart. He also told us (Paputol-putol man, maiintindihan mo parin. By the way he can only understand English at that time) of all the things he was learning. Anyway we had a sparkling and stammering conversation with him. We enjoyed it immensely.

In sharp contrast to Bien's happy descriptions of school, his teachers told us that he just keeps on roaming around the classroom, grabbing toys from other classmates including their food. For that week in which BS was spending his class, my whole heart is crunching….. I was very tensed. I could no longer answer some questions that the other parents were asking me. Is the child okey? Is he autistic? Is he normal?

Hay , I also have my own struggles. He was pulled out from the regular class when he had bitten his classmate. Can you imagine how furious the mother of the victim to me? Gez…. He was then put in a special section. His new classmates were if not all mostly like him who were undergoing difficulty adjusting in their new environment.

The class was very chaotic. During his first day in that special section he was tied by his teachers. He got so wild and he had bitten another classmates again. The kind of discipline were explained to me and I told myself to once again trust them.

6 months later

Totally Bien is a different child today compared to what he was 6 months ago. He is tamed now, respectful, can talk visayan, tagalog and english fluently. Thanks to his therapist and to teacher Nida. In his special class session he always got perfect scores in all examinations. Until Teacher Nida and the principal of the school decided to put him back to his old section.

His old classmates welcomed him. Some teased him . Hoy abno….. hoy abno!

It pains me when he told me that his classmates told him that his crazy.

"Mommy sabi nya abnormal daw ako."

I got furious.

I went inside the class and talk to those children teasing him. I scared those children.

Gone are the days when I will just shut up. I will fight for my son's right to live and learn peacefully. I got some book and asked those children to read it. No one from that group reads well. I called my son and told him to read the book for them. Graciously he did it well. One child told the group that BS is very smart and I said you are right because he is better than you do. He is much brighter than you are.

Kawawang children….. natakot talaga sa akin. Then the teachers just smiled at me. Probably extending thoer patience to how I was feeling at that time.

I have talked to the parents and to the teachers after the said incident. Thank God most of them were very cooperative and for those who were not…. to hell with them!!

Now his in a regular section and we decided to still continue the therapy. He is doing well. He perfects his exams. He writes and reads better than most of his classmates and he got this Wordsmart award during their periodical recognition. Slowly Bien is proving his self worth to his classmates on his own.

I am so happy. God showed me the doorway to improved my son.

I am so sorry for questioning him.

He knows better.

First time

Dad told me that the only award he had during his preschool and elementary days was the Most Behave Award. Isang beses lang nangyari yun at takot na takot pa daw nga siyang itanong dun sa mga kaklase niyang may honors kung saan sya banda uupo. Ni hindi nga nya naintindihan kung anong klaseng award ang matatanggap kaya dahan-dahan niyang nilapitan ang isang klasmate at itinanong kung saan uupo yung may award na pinakamabait. Ang lakas ng tawa ko habang nagkukuwento sya.
Bien started his preschool at 4 years old. During his first and second periodical recognition, he was awarded as Best Reader in the class. A word smart award. Dad was quite busy during those times. Kaya nga he was so excited nung magka-award ulit si Bien on its third periodical recognition. He made it to a point na makaka-atend talaga sya sa recognition. He filed his leave earlier and I know that he was really sorry for not being with us everyday (kaya kahit isipin ko lang yung time na sinabi nya sa akin na Mommy sorry for not waking up with you. Nakupo! Na-feel ko how sincere he really was kahit pa nga ba alas kuwatro na ng umaga yun)

okey back to our topic...

During the ceremony, ang tagal-tagal muna bago tinawag ang name ni BS. Kahit nga ako, nagdududa na baka wala siyang award. He was about to cry while looking to his other classmates who had accepted their own certificates. I told my self na baka masyadong napre-pressure ang bata na magka-award.... natakot tuloy ako na baka me mali sa pagpapalaki ko. Baka nga masyado ko na syang na-prepressure. Hmmm, kailangan kong magrecollect! OA!!! Si Dad din pala tensyonado. Nararamdaman ko yun at nababasa sa kanyang mga body language. Hindi nga rin sya mapakali sa kanyang kinauupuan.

Finally, Tinawag na rin si BS at talagang napatalon si Bien sa tuwa nooong narinig nya ang kanyang pangalan, pati rin si Dad ay biglang napatayo para sabayan si BS na kunin ang certificate doon mismo sa stage.

Hay.... sarap sarap talaga ng pakiramdam ko while watching at them on stage. I was so inspired doing both shooting them in our video and clicking the other gadget for digital pictures.

Sinalubong ko si Bien at kinungcratulate nung pababa na sila ng stage. I am honestly proud!
"Mommy, happy na ako!" he said
"Oh bakit naman?" pa-oa ko pa na tanong. syempre kunyari di ko alam.
"Kasi Word Smart ako."
I told him that its okey kung may award o wala man sya as long as he did his best.
then he answered "Best talaga Mommy!" banggit nya sa akin habang nakatingin sa mga mata ko. Nakita ko ring namgingislap sa tuwa ang mga eyes nya.
Kinalong sya ni Dad na parang beybi pa at pinaghahalikan kahit sa harap ng madaming tao.
O, asan ka makakita ng ganyan.... ang sweet.

On our way to McDo he told me all his angst during his younger years. Lumaki daw syang hindi confident. Naka-smile lang ako habang nakikinig sa kanya.
Madami rin pala siyang regrets.
I assured him that everythings okey.
After listening to all his sentiments gilingaw na nako sya until we ended in bed making love until dawn.
So first time ni Dad sa stage at first time ko naman na hanggang dawn. Hahahaha

Si Mommy Kikay

My mother owned a five-door apartment fronting our house. In door 3, there lived a young couple who got a child that don’t stay with them. From what I heard the child lives with his grandparents (Parent po ng girl).

One night, a hullabaloo happened. There was a lady screaming and throwing stones exactly in there apartment's door. The lady is about 35 years old claiming to be the wife of the man inside the house named Gerome. In the middle of the night almost all the neighborhood woke up and witnessed the scene. Different reactions were uploading thier faces.

As the woman continued with her scandal, Gerome, the womanizer in this story gets out the house very calmly as he tries to unruffled the feelings of his wife while the number two named Ging-ging stayed inside the house.

An exchanged of bad words flowed out from each others tongue. I wonder where did their love go. They have children as what I heard in the conversation.

To make the story short, the chaotic scenario was being finished when Gerome finally lived the area. Then the wife did not accept his invitation to live my mom's apartment and ride the motor so they could go home together. Accordinglyshe will still report the scenario in Makar Police Station.
Then Gerome shouted.
"Testingi! Dira na gyud ta ka patyun" (Try it! That would be the time that I will kill you!!!)

Up in the morning my mother talked about what happened last night while I was still busy washing my face in our kitchen sink. I told her that if I am the wife, I will surely do my best to get the man suspended from his job. He is a teacher and it is his moral obligation to live by example.

Then my father gets in the scenario. We saw him entering the kitchen and I saw my mommy winking naughtily her right eyes to me.

Papa got a glass of water when mommy asked him if he knew the latest tsismis. To our surprise he was truly updated. Geezzz…. as always.

Mommy : Naku, ako pala ang huli Lalab!

Me : Oo nga eh, iba talaga si Papa…. Updated

Papa : Matagal ko ng alam yan. Nasabihan na ako ni Diding.

Diding is my sister-in-law. Wife of my eldest brother.
Then we were all laughing.

Me : Paano yan mommy, madrama kong sabi. Si Erv di nagpadala ng pera… baka me kabit na yun. Then I wink my eyes secretly to her. But still acting like Im really worried.

Mommy: Oo nga Lalab, puntahan na natin sa Davao agad-agad. Sakay ng mommy ko.
Aba! Ang galing din palang umarte!!!

Papa: Hee! Para kayong mga sira! Saway ni papa. Kung ganyan kayo ng ganyan, mangangabit talaga yang asawa mo.

Mommy: Bakit pala Papa? Ano ang gusto mo?

Naninghawak pa si Mommy na lumapit ke Papa. Ready to argue with him as she was trying to open an argument pointblank.

Mommy: Mahuli na ang lahat? Yung nakabuntis na si Erv?

Nabilaukan ata ako doon. Di ko na napigilang tumawa sa acting ni Mommy and all of us were laughing already. Even my father was also laughing so intensely that his eyes were already clouded with water.

Grabe talaga Mommy ko…. One in a million. How I love her. She is the best clown in the whole world. SHE CAN MAKE MY FATHER LAUGH.

A hundred kinds of laughters.

Missing Dad

It's been a while since we did'nt see Dad. He's always busy in school. Kasi naman, nag nursing pa.... di na makuntento sa mga milyong ibinibigay ko sa kanya. Ibang klase talaga itong Daddy namin ni BS. Maprinsipyo pero naman karinyoso din... sobra!

Before going to take my afternoon nap today, BS told me that he misses his dad.
tanong ko naman na ala-korean (sometimes kasi pag nagbibiruan kami ni Bien, yun kunyari ang language na gamit namin. Naniniwala naman yung ibang pinsan nya na marunong nga kami! Bongga!!!)

Weyu? tanung ko ulit.

Napasmile si Bien.... di naman kasi sya nagbibiro nung sinabi nyang namiss nya si dad.
Kasi, I wanna play computer. He answered.
Hay naku... i-kiss na lang kita kasi male-late ka na. Sabay halik sa kanyang mababangong armpit. Singhot na singhot ko ang paborito nyang green apple scent ng Bench. Tawa naman siya ng tawa... at yun.... nagba-bye na sila ng Tita Shane nya papuntang school.
Looking at Bien today, nakakawala na talaga ng worries.... He is getting better and better everyday.

Yun nga lang, nakakapagod talagang magdisplina ng bata.
On the other hand, okey din naman ang feeling.... rewarding masyado lalo na kung nag e-excel sya sa school. nararamdaman ko na ngayon ang feelings ng mommy ko kapag nagsasabit sya ng medal sa akin noon. Hehehe, matalino din pala ako nung maliit, ksi may honor ako nung grade one. Bwahahahahaha!!!

Ay, eto, biglang tumunog si Cellphone. I knew its our daddy. Namimiss din nya daw kami... syang naman, ang lungkot lungkot nya sa Davao kasi he is living alone sa house namin. So in short he called me up just to hear my voice. Walastik! Fantastik!!!

Onething about my dad, he may not be the sweetest person I know but he is the best husband one could ever have. He loves me very much and I believed him. Ewan ko, feel ko masyado eh, to the highest level pa nga. He would eat me, kiss me and worst pinakahate nako, lick me in every chances he get. Kanang mutan-aw lang mi ug TV together (mostly korean movies nga pirated dvds ) mukalit lang gyud ug tilap sa batok nako, earlobes.... hay.... naku..... kalaban ko talaga yan. But of course nakatoothbrush na sya nun. Naman....

In every moment we shared, we have fun!!!

You know, I may not be the most beautiful girl in this universe, not the sexiest pero the luckiest to have someone as good and as papable as Ervien. There I said it.... finally.... Ervien po ang name nya.

He always make me feel like a diamond.
Rare and precious!

Me and Bs Liit

It was really a wonder how my human turnado child turned out to be so diciplined and smart. After all, God is always good.

Praise you po !!!
Sa lahat ng mga pagkukulang ko, patawarin nyo po ako at sa lahat ng blessings, maraming salamat po!

Ang laki na po ng inimprove ni Bien Lord. After months that he was in a special section, naibalik na po sya sa regular class and he is doing good. May award po sya at is sa mga pinaka magaling sa class.
Thank you po ha? Wala na ako talagang paglalagyan ng thank you. Andami po in my heart.

Papa

The computer is located on the left-side window of my room facing north. In its right is my bed. At around 3 am today I was wide awake. Dont know why maybe its been so cold that I turned off the aircon before sleeping this night. I wake up witnessing the rain falling as I opened my eyes looking outside my window pane.

The feeling is so refreshing as the breeze is touching my skin in its best.

I realized the wonders of nature this morning. They are playing with me right now.

So I played Nora Jones album to brighten-up the emotions that keeps on dancing in my heart and at 29 I felt like a little girl again playing, dancing and singing with my papa.

It has been years I remember in the same house when I was still the one who fills up the attention of my father. I am the only girl and the apple of his eyes. I grew with all the love I needed from him. As I was writing this today, I can not help but smile remembering my father in his younger years. All darked- hair, not-so fat and so handsome.

You can still figure the authority, decency and wisdom in his eyes filled with love and contentment.

Though he is still handsome today, white grayed hair and yet he has continued to be so good to all his grand children. Up to now he never get tired supporting all of us especially me.

It was him who brought back my confidence that was lost during my lawschool years in Ateneo de Davao University. Though still trying to renewed it when I was working in SMICZMP for almost 6 years. When I resigned from work and concentrated on my child who has been suffering from psychological pain, it was my papa who saved me from all my pain.

He is a hero and everything to me. In his unending faith in my capabilities, he had bring me back the life I had when I was still a child. So confident and so free.

My greatest fear is to see him suffering. Hurting in pain caused by diabetes. My research about that ailment chilled my heart to death. I am so scared seeing my father one day in a distress. I just don’t know how to cope up with it without even showing him my real emotions.

In these days together with my mother, we are trying to served him vegetables and anything that will help strengthen his health. He is still in a very good condition. Thank God for that!!!

I have a big heart for my Papa. I love him morethan anything in this world. He had given me everything a daughter deserves.

I am continuously praying that may the Lord blessed us more financially to support him in his thunder days. I know my husband wont mind .

He is also thankful to my father for helping us survived in our difficulties. Forever it will remain.

He had sailed a lot of seas, he had crossed many mountains, he had blown a lot of love for us.

His existence braced up my securities.

I need not talk

I need not look at his eyes

He already knows everything my heartיִs desire.

I wonder how heיִ'd made it.

He is powerful. He is love