Oct 30, 2007

Wonder Five

What's In a Number 5?
This Five MeMe is from Marie. You are so kind. Thank you so much.

WHAT'S IN MY ROOM?
* Black curtains
* weighing scale
* Personal Computer
* Books
* Airconditioner

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO..
* date Andy Garcia
* play with snowman
* watch Caribbean Cinema with Juday in Singapore
* Live in New Zealand together with my family and friends
* get my desired weight

WHAT'S IN MY BAG?
* cellphone
* book
* pen
* blush on make up
* moneyyy

WHAT'S IN MY WALLET?
* cash
*atm cards
* stickers
* lipton tea
* IDs

I'M CURRENTLY INTO…
* Blogging
* Reading the book of Frank Mc Court’s Angela’s Ashes
* watching La Vendetta TVshow
* Playing badminton
* losing weight

How about you Bes? (ewww.... unsaon pag tag?)

Oct 25, 2007

A warm cup

Nothing much is happening now. My dinner is over. I look at my child. He was smiling. I sip my coffee and it was so hot. It burns my tongue. Buanga oi... absent-minded ko duh.
My child laughed at me.
I asked him whats so funny?
and he told me nothing mom... you know its hot and you drink it like a coke.

Oh my god... i can not seem to change it nowww... nagbibinata na si BS. Dili na sya babyyyy....

I nod and embraced him. Giving him lots of kisses in his face, neck and stomach
pero gang mao ni ang iyang gisulti...

"MOMMY!!! stop itttt bahhh six years old na ako. "
"Pag six years old na pala, di na magpa-kiss BS?"
he was smiling back at me and answered
"Bien ako lagi not BS. May GF na ako... si Camelle at Corazon"
"Hindi oi... friends mo lang yan sila" I said to him smiling
"Iba man friends ko, iba rin asawa ko" he answered excitedly.
"Haa?" I reacted
"si Marimar..sya ang asawa ko kasi mas pogi ako kay sergio oi" he added

I nod. Looking at the way he looks. Very happy and very excited. I feel his hand on my skin. I smiled and told my son that I am so happy for him. He is an improved person now.

"What did you say? Improved? Why?" tanong ba naman nya bigla.
Di ko tuloy masagot. Yannn dahil sa kadramahan ko today.
"Nothing Bien oi. "

At least while my coffee is too warm, dili man sad ko cold. (gets?)
Ambot... wa man gani ko... heheee
"Mommy... come. See o? Marimar na!!!" Bien told me..
"Tinggnan mo ang asawa ko, ang ganda talaga oi." he added

I just smiled back...
Oo nga naman, maganda talaga sya. Parang mas nag-fit sa kanya ang role kesa kay Angel.

Hanepp... sayang naman at tinanggihan nya.
Everything happens for a rerason talaga.
Siguro panahon na ni Marian (the actress who played the role of Marimar) ngayon.
And honestly, buti na lang, di ko na hinahanap-hanap yung kinababaliwan ko.

I am back now na gyud diay.
Thank God.

Oct 23, 2007

My mom!!!!


My mom attended an informal debate today aired in Bombo radio Station in Gensan.
Ang taas ng rating ng program during her guesting.
I will tell you talaga na mag-eenjoy ka.
It's like watching Anabelle Rama's frankness, yun nga lang mas educated naman magsagot ang mommy.
I was surprised by her wits.
She easily answered all issues against her SmaRtlY.
Ang galing!!!
Ngayon ko lang nadiscover how well-verse she is in her chosen profession.
I am proud of her... win or lost she will always be number 1 to me.

Oct 22, 2007

uNTITLEd

I remember liking my husband only as friend during my lawschool days in Ateneo. I was sure that there was nothing he can do to become my bf. For years , I was still living in the shadow of XXXXXX.
On the other hand he was very persistent to have me. I know that. I felt it. Di naman sa nagmamaganda oi. Kunti lang hehehe. Or maybe he knows that I was not dating anyone in particular kaya he was always ready to ignite his desire for me. Nakss!!!
Ang sweet kaya nya... and until now pala ...
He always pursue me with calls, notes, and dinner sometimes lunch at breakfast pa. Sa kabila ng kahinaang nakita noon, he tried pala to still be the best husband I could ever have. Kahit papano naman it was me who became indifferent. I forgot that I married a human not a saint. Bigla ba naman akong sumuko? Minsan naiisip ko kung bakit ko naman hinayaang mawala yung love ko sa kanya at nailipat ito sa ibang tao. Ewwww....
Nais kong kalimutan ang kabanatng ito ng buhay ko pero mas gusto ko rin namang isulat ang kung ano mang nararamdaman meron ako at this time.

Haaayyy... untitled to kasi.. wala lang, im just taking a grip. Kapagod kayang mangampanya oi.

Oct 18, 2007

mountain





I just climbed this mountain from Maribulan, Sarangani Province where my client planted the mahogany trees as their commitment for the protection of Sarangani Bay. While working on it I realized that I also have my beautiful twin mountains.
Hehehehe!!! Jowwwkkkk....


The copycat mountain... (mao!!!)

Blinded

Reading my other blog, I realized how stupid I was for just thinking of leaving my family for the sake of one man that I dont even know. How can I be so inlove with him when we were only communicating through the internet.

Today, I am almost crying. Ang tindi ng tupak ko for the last 6 months...
Hello................ Loviellyyyyy!!!
I am glad your back to your normal self now.

When I told my husband about my feelings today. He hugged me and he even told me that he was praying for a second chance.
Halaka..... how can i ever leave him? He is enough gift God had showered me.

Ang nakita ko lang pala sa kanya ay yung kahinaan at kakulangan nya.
Now, nakikita kong mas madami pala syang good traits keas dun sa bad.

He love his family morethan anything else in this world. My God.... ngayon k lang po narealized. TYhank you Lord dahil you let me see the right path na hindi pa komplikado ang sitwasyon.

Nabaguk yata ang head ko tonight, Ni hindi ko pa natatapos i-review yung mga pinagdaanan ko for six months with the other man in cyberworld through my documented feelings ay nasasaktan na ako for my husband. Shiiittttttt!!!! Ang lupittt ko pala....

Oct 17, 2007

Me as Cyberman's girl

(this article is still part of the series tHAT I'm going to publish here. I feel uneasy reading this again? Hayyy... naunsa diay ko ani? Katingalahan!!!) Hilassss kaayo


In this picture I was sad. You know why? Because I was a jealous and insecure person at that time when I shot this. I was so selfish that I was only thinking of my own happiness. I totally forgot that my bebek is also a human. Like me, he had feelings as well.
(I am glad that I have realized to get this mood away from me.)


I used to be very possessive, jealous, domineering and controlling to my bebek.
I am fortunate that he is not that type instead he would comfort and assured me every time
that I am the only woman he loves!
Hmmm..... see how pretty I am?
He is making me a happy and beautiful person inside and out.

That is why I am very scared to hurt him and make him sad.
So beginning yesterday I have decided to be independent from him.
Trust seems to be very important to Spiderdad.
I have failed him in that area and made him sad many many times.

I also keeps on bothering him.
Sending him letters and letters and lots of letters in a day.
Ohhh, see I was a bad and very immature girlfriend.
That I realized only today.

Indeed, I am so lucky to have him.
Today he find me strong.
He said He was worried.
I am confused?
Really.

I hope that by giving him trust and freedom
he would still love me the way he is giving me love.
i could not asked for more.
He is giving me the best love one could ever have.

I thank him for really giving a big difference in my life.
I learned many things from him.
Today I was really trying not to sent him anything in his e-mails and YM
I may disturb him in his work
He also has his own life
As I should also be busy in my life here.

I must always remember that our love-time is during our vacant time in a day. My mornings and his evenings.

Watch my picture here.
I am happy today because I am no longer insecure.

Murat deserves to be trusted.

If he is sad, I will also be sad.

When he smiles at me every morning..... I realized how much joy it brings to my heart.

Hmmmm.... I really love him!!! Like duh!!!!

Loving will make you look good and sexy. So why dont you love?





Posted by wITChy Boop at 9:25 PM

1 comment:

spiderman said...

nice words baby..
ı lıke when you jealous me baby
really..
ı lıke when you worry at me..so that is a sign for to attach importance..
ı lıke every all them because you esteem me
really ı lıke so much
muck..thnaks again for loving me

Different Emotions





Letting go

(I wrote this article 4 months ago when I was still in the verge of deciding to let go of my cyberman. Nakakatawa pala ako nun (i was so funny then)..... masyadong inlove. Grabee. But I remember that while writing this, my heart was so sad.
Since I am now already a new woman, back to normal, I decided to published some of my emotions documented during my lost-times.)


My heart can not afford to smile today
I will bear my sadness in my sleep
How could he be so cold?
What have I done?

If its the beginnng of our end
Then this is also the end of this Blog?
Will I say goodbye BettyBoop?
Will I say goodbye Spiderdad?

To all the memories
Will it stay?

I dont know
I have seen the sadness in me.... felt it..... huge...empty....
Im in darkness now
I hope to see the light
soon...
soon...

Goodnight Lovi.
Goodnight to me.

I hope to sleep tight tonight.

Oct 16, 2007

Confession part 2

My son is always proud of me. I know and he is very sweet to make me feel that everyday.
When I was about to use the CR in the schoolcampus, I saw a 5 year old child crying inside. Her eyes were so scared and her shoulders were trembling...
I asked her what happened?
"Gibiyaan na mi sa akung mama...." (my mother left me already. She said while still crying.
I felt her pain.
Para akong nakuryente.

I can not imagine my son crying this way.
So helplessss....
So confuseeedddd
So..... lost!!!

I hugged the child then she hugged me back.
Then my son followed me pala.
He was behind me all this time and yet I did not know.
"XXXXX, your mommy is bad. My mommy? She is not bad." proudly declared by my son to her classmate XXXXXX.
Then the boy hugged the child after he give the girl his hanky.

I feel so guiltyy...
" Ako na lang mommy mo ha dito sa school..." I told her.

I wrapped my arms around her.
I still feel up tonow the neartbeat of the child.
Ang bilis bilis pero nung yakap ko na... unti-unti namang kumalma na..
And pati ang love that I felt for my cyberman... kumalma na rin.

That day was the most wonderful day in my life.
God send me angels to remind me that I am already happy.

Its not hard to let go.
Its not hard to be selfless.
My family needs me.
Above all, they love me 100 percent

Confession part 1

During the time when I felt like i dont love my husband, i cheated him. I was honestly inlove in my chatmate. I can not even believed that it is indeed possible to fall inlove with someone you just knew only in cyberworld.

Its been six months communicating with him everyday.
Six months of infidelity.
Six months of believing that I love this guy from the net
and that I am willing to give up everything for him including my son.

Oh my god......

I dont know my self anymore....
Cyberman occupied my worldddd....
I was so productive in my work
I was so inspired to always look good.
Positively, I really feel beautiful and attractive.
I gained back my confidence
and independence.

But during that time, I lost my love for my husband.
I tried gaining it back while I was still attached to my cyberman but
it did not work.
Of course, it wont work at all (obviously)

Every time my husband visits us here, I know he felt the difference.
I can always see the panic in his eyes...
and I was so bad....
I dont even care about his feelings...
All i know is that feel so cold with him.
He tried fixing up hid difficulties.
He even asked for forgiving him to all the pain he caused me.
I forgive him . I told him that.
And I honestly told him also thaT He lost me.
I can not give him my heart anymore.
He just keep quite. He knows me well. When I decide something , yun na talaga yun.
He just told me na sana its not yet too late for him.

Advices from my friends will definitely not work on me.
I was so blinded with my loVe for cyberman.
Oh my god.... I can not explain, but ours is different.
You know its hard to believe but we really love each other.
And I am happy, I am very happy... I am even willing to just die with him.

One day, there was an activity in my son's school.
I attended together with my 4 years old niece lingling.
I had with me my black revealing clothing wrap in my heeheee body (alangan!!).

My niece Lingling followed the color of my attire. Since I am curly, I dont usually comb my hair.... the kid followed it again.
My father was laughing and he told me that I AM lINGLING'S idol.
"Bitaw!!!" (yes!) the child proudly answer.
"pero si Tita mo, dili absenot sa class. Honor parati tapos goodgirl"(but your tita was an achiever in school, she was always present in claSS. aND She is always a goodgirl) said by my papa.
"good and bright girl sad ko oi?" proudly answered by Lingling.

I was a bit touched by how my father and my niece looks up to me.
If they only know ... I told my self while having a very deep sigh.